There isn’t much holiday cheer in Washington these days. Just endless talk about the fiscal cliff. The knuckleheads who run your government, from one end of Pennsylvania Avenue to the other, are doing what they do best: stall and obfuscate.

In turn, that has led to another round of fear and loathing by the people. Fear of what will happen if Congress and President Obama let the January deadlines pass. And loathing of those same elected officials for skittering so close to the edge of the cliff and endangering everyone’s financial security.

And yet… I can’t get Jingle Bells out of my head. This version was sung at the Gridiron Club winter dinner earlier this month, with inside-the-Beltway alterations to the lyrics. It’s a catchy ditty, sung to the tune of Jingle Bells. Give it a whirl. It might take your mind off the fear and loathing.

(with apologies to songwriter James Lord Pierpont and thanks to the wicked lyricist Dave Werner)


“Christmas time is here

The year’s not over yet

How can Congress raise

The ceiling on the debt.

“Boehner makes a speech

and we all make a wish

That both sides can avoid a

scary budget precipice.

 “Oh! fiscal cliff, fiscal cliff

Coming any day

No one has a magic wand to make it go away!


“Fiscal cliff, fiscal cliff

Thanks to Grover Norquist and his Tax Protection Pledge!

Let’s hope our elected leaders can find a way to avoid falling, jumping or leaping off the cliff. We need a Gang of Whatever-Number-Is-Necessary to show the way. Who will step up?

Sandy Johnson is a journalist and a gardener, equally passionate about both. She lives in Alexandria, VA.  Visit her on her blog, Grassroots & Gardening.